Monday, August 28, 2006

"I Have Had It with These Motherfuckin' Snakes on This Motherfuckin' Plane!"

(title courtesy of Samuel L. Jackson--see his "giddy" appearance on The Daily Show)

The closer it has gotten to August 29 ("anniversary" is too marital and positive), the worse I feel physically. The past week my insomnia has "flared" (instead of waking at 4 a.m., I've been wide-eyed, and pissed, at 2); my stomach is unsure, impossible to fill, empty or please; muscles so coiled I live on the verge of a tension headache or migraine (need a tequila IV); my other PTSD and PKSD symptoms are also worse, stronger, more bewildering and/or annoying. Used to living with a certain constant of tiredness, I can't get it going (relatively speaking).

Judith Herman quotes 5a and b apply. It's not as much what happened to us as much as what didn’t and hasn't happened--help, assistance or rescue; attention, funding, oversight, decision-making; apologies, restitution, healing. Even folks with no or minimal damage (and I hear a heartbreaking number of folks say their damage was minimal because they "only" lost a whole floor or half the roof) are in limbo, waiting, waiting with the rest of the city. Until insurance companies stop their bullshit, until folks are no longer camping out in half-gutted or gutted homes or piece-of-shit expensive-as-white-gold trailers (in the Ninth Ward, Lakeview, Gentilly, Broadmoor, the Seventh Ward), until those who want to come back can and those who want to stay don’t feel cornered into leaving, until we have enough open and functioning public schools and hospitals, until all are "okay" none are "okay."


Anonymous Grandmère Mimi said...

I know you're not OK, G. It's not really time to commemorate, because it's so not over yet.

I suffered only tree limbs down and a big clean-up, but my heart still bleeds for the folks in my home town. It feels almost like a death in the family to me, and I know, because I lost two sisters in a little over a year with Katrina in the middle of those losses.

I was talking to a woman who worked at my hotel and listening her sad story, and there are so many more stories out there like hers.

How can Bush even show his face in the territory? The people in New Orleans are in a quagmire, barely able to keep their heads above the glop.

until all are "okay" none are "okay."

That's right. I hope you fell better, G.

Mon Aug 28, 07:40:00 PM  

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